Types of Bitches....Oh Lord this is FUNNY to me!!!

OK.... I've been off the blog crawl for a while and for the life of me I can not figure out why!! I love crawling blogs because of things like this....

http://andiamnotlying.com/2010/types-of-bitches/

BTW... I'm at steady 29, 63 and 88 and occasionally a 32 if anyone needs some assistance in being a number 29!!

Love YA!!!

The unmitigated gall of some women...

OK so I post my Engagement Pics on FB. I get a note from a woman (let’s call her TC). TC’s note is short and simple……Congratulations Deon. Then came a tag request and a friend request. Since she is not familiar to me and the note is to Dion. I call and ask him.... Do you know a TC? "No, but what does she look like. Is she from Wize Wordz?" I don’t know but she is requesting to friend me AND…(here’s the kicker folks)…of all the pictures I posted – 20 in all. The only one she tagged is the one of you all by yourself!! He says the name is not familiar so I tell him I’ll show him her tonight when I get home. In the meantime, I send her a note and apologize for not knowing her and ask if we’ve met. Or if it’s Dion she knows. Her response…. "We’ve never met but we have a mutual friend CH and I know Dion from Albany."

Later on that night, I show Dion her pic and he’s says OHHHHHHH that’s Tracey. I know her from a while back I think she moved back to the city. Now please understand that we use know in the biblical sense in my house. So he KNEW her once or twice.

Please someone tell me why she thought it would be appropriate to friend me, and then have the unmitigated gall to tag his picture from our engagement shot for her photo album.

This here is the shit that makes women everywhere look bad……OY!!

Engagement Session

Huge THANKS to the Family Photog!!! Thanks La!!

Wow! Seriously? That sucks.

Ever heard someone say something and think WOW!! Seriously? When did THAT become you? Seriously, so not loving you right now…damn.

Really hope that is not here to stay…but you kind of know it is. SUCKS

Who am I and who did I replace myself with?

So funny thing happened yesterday…

I was talking to one of my BFF’s and she said... “Where is the old (insert name here) that use to co-sign all my craziness?”. All the way home, I kept thinking….Yeah where the hell is she? When did I become the person who asks… Why are you going to do that? What do you think (insert name here) is going to say? When did I start caring what other people think or want?

For all of you that don’t know this…. This is a startling revelation!! What the hell? Now my BFF attributed it to me getting engaged, but I know that is a bunch of BS. But what is it? Did this happen gradually or all at once? Has this way of thinking been creeping up on me slowly and then one day just ambushed me? Seriously, is the real me in a pod in someone’s basement?

I shutter to think that I might be living my life by the same rules that “they” follow…
I abhorred the thought that one day someone is going to call me to be talked OUT of something…

What happened to the person whose classic response was.. “Fuck it, what’s the worse thing that could happen?” Then when we thought through the worst case scenario…would easily justify all negative outcomes as fate or irrelevant.

I liked that person. I was fun. I took no prisoners. I hurdled that weak and trampled the dead. I was the friendly proclaimed “Queen of Justification”.

Now, who am I? Fuck…

secretly discriminated against at the mall?

Ok so all of you that know me know I’m NOT skinny but I had a revelation while shopping with my newly skinny BFF!! She and I shop all the time… in fact we met while working for a major retailer. So we were destined to be mall rats!! She and I have been shopping together for over 15 years and during that time we have been on the right side of plump and frankly FIERCE!! However BFF had gastric surgery a few months back and has since lost 100lbs (yeah la) and looks great (wanna read and see all about it).

Here comes the observation….

Thinner people get better and more attention in the mall!! Well who the hell would have thought that? I mean seriously, you’d think better dressed people would get better service. We know white and older people get better service. But who would have predicted THINNER? Not me. The increase in the level of service we incurred was so startling that I stopped midway out of one of the stores and asked her if she found this strange. And she advised me that her “service factor” increased as her weight went down!! Is there some kind of hidden book in the mall employee handbook that says fat girls don’t spend money? Are we somehow bringing down the “cool-factor” by just being in the store and they want us to leave? What is it?

Did I mention that I’m shopper, if I’m bored I shop, sad…shop, happy….shop. I shop in both high-end and budget retailers and frankly, we all know the level of service varies a great deal in mall stores. But let me tell you what didn’t vary… In EVERY store, we were greeted and asked if we needed or wanted help….EVERY STORE!!

All I have to say is when I go in those stores again solo…. The clerks better be ready to haul stuff, go check in the back, bring out at least several pairs of shoes etc… They just let the wrong person know she was being secretly discriminated against!!!

You can even be President of the United States!

Back when I was a kid… I remember people, teachers, relatives, clergy etc… constantly telling us. “You can be anything you want to be…You can even be President of the United States!” I’m not sure they believed what they were telling us, but I am sure they wanted us to believe it. They wanted us to aspire to such greatness…..To hope and believe that we could make a difference. Hell, I told my daughter the same thing more than a few times.

Well I have to tell you I never aspired to be president. It was around 2nd grade when they told us how much he makes in salary and I decided it wasn’t enough…lol.

But it’s nice to know that even if they didn’t believe it and I was only half hearted in my belief… It was true!! Who would have thought?

PLEASE...pretty please!!!!

Wanna See my (not so new) Beau?

Hoping

That this blank slate will motivate me to blog....